"If It's Brown, Drink it Down.

If it's black, send it back." - Homer Simpson

 

Drinking cultures. Where would the world be without them? Ever participated in a North American drinking game called the "Boat Race"? Or how about going shot for shot with a tequila factory worker? Or maybe three bottles of vodka with a Finn over a meal of salted fish?

If you answered "Yes" to any of the above questions, chances are you've woken up in a dumpster at least once. If not a dumpster, then definitely a bathtub.

Georgians have their own drinking traditions. The men are seasoned consumers brought up on Chacha (distilled red wine tipping the alcoholic content scale at 61%), vodka, and home wine (a brown liquid, purportedly made from grapes, that resembles cloudy apple juice). That combination would rile even the most experienced beer-swilling frat boy.

A typical afternoon/evening starts with a trip to a local restaurant. Groups of four or five men, equipped with a five litre jug of the aforementioned home wine, are the usual participants. Snacks, kebab, and xingali (dumplings) are promptly ordered to help soak up the impending onslaught of alcohol. It's going to be a long night.

The first toast, and by no means the last one, starts with everyone standing up and holding their full glass of wine. Words are exchanged. Somebody makes a joke. Everyone laughs. Then it's down to business. You tip your glass up and polish off the whole glass in a single gulp. Subsequent toasts tend to involve nonsense as opposed to coherent speech. The men get more affectionate and, if I could understand Georgian, much more complimentary.

Two hours later, everyone is drunk. It's right about now that approaching the foreigners sitting at the table next to you becomes appropriate. Language barriers are broken down (the foreigners are likely under the same alcoholic spell you are), pleasantries such as "you are my brother" and "I hope you like my country" are verbalized. You can just feel the camaraderie permeating the room. Alas, the drunken man stumbles away back to his friends.

"Same time, same place tomorrow?" he confirms.