Where to Begin?

"Things got a little out of hand when my Ukrainian Uncle made us take shots of olive oil." -My Brother, Rory.

I think I'll start by setting the scene:

Last time I visited my Aunt and Uncle's place, this heavenly entity known as a "Keg Fridge" was parked in the kitchen. Yes, you could tap beer off into frosted glasses held in the freezer and drink India Pale Ale til your face fell off. This same Uncle also has a garage door in his house. Want an unobstructed view of the lake? Open up the garage door.

This was two years ago. Apparently, things had changed while I was away. First, a new kitchen was installed...two ovens, a griddle, a grill, four burners, industrial strength range hood, large chopping block, and one neon sign. Second, a 54" projection screen with the HDTV package was put in for entertainment purposes. Third (as if anything could beat the keg fridge), the keg fridge was moved downstairs and replaced by a beer tap. Just imagine having your own beer tap inside your house. Three major improvements = #1 destination in the Kootenay area.

Right about now, it should be pretty clear why we made the hour and a half journey to visit our relatives. And that was only the start of it....

Naturally, you can't even sit down in the house without a pint of beer in your hand. I swear, the novelty is incredible...you can just sit there all day and tap off pints and pitchers. Life really is good. After countless glasses later, the conversation really started to reach its highpoint, but not before fennel/coriander wings, ridiculously spicy cauliflower soup, homemade pizza, and lamb chops were brought out. Such one-liners included:

"Look at that old geiser. We should wrap him in gauze and send him to the British Museum."

Somewhere in between the fits of laughter and plates of food, a rant about olive oil was started by my Uncle. He had bought some really expensive stuff in London and was complaining about how bad it was compared to what you could buy at Safeway. Then came the shot glasses...filled with olive oil.

When I think about the worst shots I've had, vodka and scotch usually come to mind. Well, move over disgusting hard liquors, enter Expensive London Extra Virgin Olive Oil. So there we were, shooting olive oil like a bunch of oilaholics. In the end, it was determined that the Safeway product (Colavita Brand) was better.

Numerous beers, frequent bathroom trips, and one short sleep later, it was time for a breakfast consisting of bacon, breakfast sausages, and a giant fritatta. The only thing that was underutilized was that 54" projection TV. Next time, I suppose.